What a thought-provoking piece and question! I remember that paralysis in my twenties and the hangover that persisted into my thirties and forties. I've stumbled into the realization that i can control how I feel about my decisions but I can't make them over again. In most cases, I can find where even the decisions I thought were the worst at the time helped me grow and be happy in unexpected ways.
To riff on the question posed, I’m not sure that believing yourself to be on the best path is necessary or truthful. You can never really know that you’re on the best path.
But I think what you can do is rest knowing that you’re taking the path that feels right now given the information you have. And as you change and get new information, you learn and adjust accordingly.
I’ve reinterpreted the past many times and imagined how things could have been different. It tortured me for a while. I’ve also been obsessed with a different path forward and it’s paralyzed me. But I learned that when we’re busy looking in both directions, either past or future, we’re never truly HERE. We never get to go out for drinks or have a picnic or explore record collections. We are looking for the next thing instead of this thing.
I don’t want to look to hard forward. I’m trying to slow down and appreciate the present. It’s more satisfying to think of what’s good instead of what could be good. If there’s a good path, it’ll come. I’ll find it or it’ll find me.
If I just take the title "Life's Infinite Paths," my best advice (from the standpoint of old age) is choose one thing and stick with it a long time. Every time you change paths or refuse to decide, you reduce the possibility of excellence and expertise that you could have obtained by choosing one thing and sticking with it.
What a thought-provoking piece and question! I remember that paralysis in my twenties and the hangover that persisted into my thirties and forties. I've stumbled into the realization that i can control how I feel about my decisions but I can't make them over again. In most cases, I can find where even the decisions I thought were the worst at the time helped me grow and be happy in unexpected ways.
To riff on the question posed, I’m not sure that believing yourself to be on the best path is necessary or truthful. You can never really know that you’re on the best path.
But I think what you can do is rest knowing that you’re taking the path that feels right now given the information you have. And as you change and get new information, you learn and adjust accordingly.
I’ve reinterpreted the past many times and imagined how things could have been different. It tortured me for a while. I’ve also been obsessed with a different path forward and it’s paralyzed me. But I learned that when we’re busy looking in both directions, either past or future, we’re never truly HERE. We never get to go out for drinks or have a picnic or explore record collections. We are looking for the next thing instead of this thing.
I don’t want to look to hard forward. I’m trying to slow down and appreciate the present. It’s more satisfying to think of what’s good instead of what could be good. If there’s a good path, it’ll come. I’ll find it or it’ll find me.
If I just take the title "Life's Infinite Paths," my best advice (from the standpoint of old age) is choose one thing and stick with it a long time. Every time you change paths or refuse to decide, you reduce the possibility of excellence and expertise that you could have obtained by choosing one thing and sticking with it.
Thank you for this much needed article.
-One maximizer to another
That was cool, thanks Lyle!